*note: don't be fooled by the date on this post. It was really written over a month ago
I don't know about you, but writing 2015 in the date feels weird, wrong even. It's crazy how quickly time flies! For instance, this week I'm starting my third trimester with baby #2. And my big baby is 17 months old, almost a year and a half. And writing how close together they are is sort of freaking me out...
Like most people, I spend the beginning of the year dreaming of goals and aspirations for that year. Last year most of my goals (not resolutions for I certainly break resolutions entirely too quickly; goals I can break but then pick back up) were focused on health and fitness. Lose 20 lbs (which I did!!!), run 100 miles (ha... maybe 50, maybe), run a 10k (as much as I wanted to, nope) and the like. To be honest, when thinking about this upcoming year I had a mental block at first. How can I make goals, especially attainable goals, when my biggest goal is just surviving April through July? See, not only are we going to have 2 under 2, but my husband will be working crazy long hours mid-April to end of June. Crazy hours as in night shifts. Add in no family within 7 driving hours (my family is 10 hours away) and April becomes a black hole in my mind. I know I'm no special case and there are tons of mamas in my boat, but tell that to my hormonal, pregnant mind.
Fortunately, I'm not alone.
"This is my command- be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or discouraged. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go. " - Joshua 1:9
"So humble yourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time He will lift you up in honor. Give all your worries and cares to God, for He cares for you." 1 Peter 5:6-7
My biggest goal this year is to trust and rely on God, believing Him for: who he says he is, for what he says he can do, for who he says I am, for the things I can do through Christ, and that his word is alive and active through me. From reading his promises in scripture and believing them best I can, I'm already feeling this huge burden lifting.
Joshua 1:5 NLT "No one will be able to stand against you as long as you live. For I will be with you as I was with Moses. I will not fail you or abandon you." I may be sleep deprived, but never abandoned. Matthew 11:28-30 NLT "Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” Truly what amazing promises and hope.
Will it still be difficult come April? Absolutely. Will I have to come back and read this for hope? Most likely. Will I be drowning in self pity and despair? Not if I believe those verses above to be true. And even if I don't believe it, they are still true.
So I'm allowing myself to dream, to make goals. I have a ton of fitness and health related ones still, but this year it's mostly a year of challenge for my faith. Will I believe and have faith? God willing, yes!
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